New Normals and a Crazy Awesome God

Since the time Bren had his MRI we knew there was a high likelihood that Bren would be diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy at some point. Bren had been doing so well and defying all other odds that we were beginning to think he would defy that one too. Then I started noticing things that weren't quite "normal". Now, Bren is our first child but I had done enough babysitting and working with children that I knew something was off. Bren started having arm movements that seemed involuntary. His arms were becoming tighter and he fought me a lot more when I tried to move them. His head control started to decline a bit. It was at that point I knew, Bren wasn't going to defy the odds of having a CP diagnosis. March 13, 2018. This was the day that Bren's physical therapist gave us the unofficial diagnosis of Cerebral Palsy. Even though we knew it was coming, it was still hard to hear. We weren't shocked. We were hurt and angry. Specifically, I was mad at God. Why had God a...

Since Bren has been born we have always had doctors or specialists telling us what we can and cannot do with Bren. We've been told how much he needs to eat and how he needs to eat. We've been told what activities and therapies to do with him. We've been told that he has to be on certain medications. It's never felt like we have had a choice in any of this. We didn't have a choice in whether or not our child was born with special needs. We haven't had a choice in any of his treatments. We haven't been given the freedom to let Bren show us what he can do. We so desperately want what's best for Bren. We trust that the doctors and specialists know what they are doing far better than what we know. But, there are days that I wish we could: -Let Bren tell us when he is hungry rather than feeding him on such a strict schedule. -Let Bren tell us how much he wants to eat. -Let Bren be a kid and not have to worry about different therapies and doing them throu...